It's interesting finding out what online people look like, no?
Well, if you DON'T want to find out what I look like, DO NOT look behind the cut. Because there are a lot of photos of me there. I've chosen all the best photos I have of myself on the puter, because I'm vain like that and I want you all to think I'm hot. Which I am. Sometimes.
Let's start at the very beginning.
The cute one on the right is me. The cute one on the left is my brother. In the middle is my mum. Dad took the photo.
Here I am in New Zealand a few years ago, at Cape Kidnappers, which is a beach with a famous gannet colony on it.
This is me and Pete in our old flat. We still live together, but in a much better place. It was also my birthday, hence the Moet, and I think I was kind of ill.
Grumpy Kate! Cheer the fuck up! What the hell I was moping about is beyond me, but look, I have freckles AND wrinkles and very small ears. Please ignore the wrinkles.
This, dear friends, is my lack of cleavage! SEXY. And you'll have to take my word for it that I looked pretty that night.
Here I am at Live 8! That's right! Pete won tickets and took little ol' me. We had this deal that we'd both enter the competition and whoever won would take the other. Of course, I completely forgot to enter. Thankfully, he won.
Kate in Edinburgh. I won't lie, I had been up all night and it was middle of the afternoon the next day. Good times.
An obscenely large photo of me in Wellington from last year. I have hazel eyes!
Work lunch in Primrose Hill, London. In the booth behind us was Billie Piper and Chris Evans. You know, Billie Piper, who plays Rose in Dr Who. So. Yeah. In London, I like to hang out near b-listers. So. I guess you're all pretty impressed. Yeah.
That blonde babe is my best friend in the whole world, Kirsten. She's a goddess.
There we are again, and the insanely beautiful girl on the right is Calypso. Yep, that's her name, don't wear it out. All three of us went to the same high school, but Calypso and I only became friends after we ran into each other in Portobello Market one time (that's the famous market from that piece of shit movie, Notting Hill).
It's not my bike. I was drunk okay. And it was there. Parked. Just waiting for me to pretend to ride it.
That's my ex boyfriend. We no longer speak.
And the following were all taken by my photographer friend, Charlotte, at a wine festival in London. That's my friend Claire, with me.
Claire, who made the following, from the above. It's on canvas, on my wall.
So was that the most narcissistic post in the history of ever? No? I'll try harder next time then.