I got to go to the zoo for free yesterday! And I saw a TIGER:



( More tiger and a camel )


( Plus bonus Charlie being cute )


( Plus bonus eagle being cool )

ETA. Oh yeah, and every cat person loves a happy kitty yes? Well check out this (crazy) video and see the world's happiest cat:

Deer Licks Cat

The 4th of July party was good. Everyone liked my Lois Lane costume (which was just me in normal party wear, flashing my press pass at people whilst saying, "Lois Lane, Investigative Reporter"). Lex was dressed as Hunter S Thompson, which meant we began the night arguing about whether or not he killed himself. I was, of course, the winner, insisting to Lex that he'd shot himself in the head a few years ago, and Lex was all, "no that was William S Burroughs" and I was all, "no, he died ages ago but he didn't shoot himself". He didn't believe me until someone else confirmed it, but that's okay because I was right.

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This morning was terrible. For the first time since I got him Charlie didn't turn up for breakfast, so naturally I freaked the fuck out and spent the morning crying and panicking and fearing the worst, only to go home at half eleven to find the little sod perfectly happy and fine and pleased with himself. So now I'm back at work and in a much better mood.

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Enty revealed his blind items this weekend on Crazy Days and Nights. For scandalous tales of celebrities behaving like douchebags (and occasionally like diamonds), scroll through the first several pages and feel better about yourself.

I'm so proud.

I give the latest Smallville wank a 3 out of 10. Poor effort, SV fandom.

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How does one teach a particularly dim cat to use a cat flap? Because he does not seem to understand that he needs to open it with his head, no matter how many times I demonstrate (with my hand not my head). He knows there's a door there because when I wedge it open with a dvd case he uses it all the time, but when it's closed he just sniffs at it a lot then gives up. Seriously, my cat is a total moron.

The other day I was channel surfing and I stumbled upon a show called "Life" and it may interest you to know that Damien Lewis is extremely attractive. He's got one of those interesting faces that's not pretty so much as handsome, and he has this incredible intensity that makes it impossible to take your eyes off him. Sort of like Hugh Laurie or Jason Dohring.

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( The L Word, 6.07: Last Couple Standing )

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My stupid cat has somehow managed to injure himself. It was during the night a few nights ago and it happened inside and, don't worry, he is totally fine, except for the bruise (or whatever it is). My guess is that he was running too fast through the house (which he does a lot) and he skidded on the floor in the lounge and banged his face into the wall or something.

( Check out his wee moustache. )

I don't have to go to work today! Because of this:
( Pictures! )

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In other news, I haven't watched the latest "Smallville" yet. Mostly because everyone seems to hate it right now for some reason or other and I can't be bothered getting angry/frustrated/sad, so I'm doing other things instead, like rewatching "Veronica Mars" season 1 with Kirsty (it's just as good if not better the second time round!), reading as much S1 LoVe fic as I can get my hands on (holy crap, THIS STORY is one the best things I've ever read), watching season 2 of "How I Met Your Mother" (LOL), ooh and watching "Baby Mama" finally, which is completely awesome. How is Amy Poehler so funny?

I got your card, dontyouwaitup! You are very funny and awesome. Thanks darlin. ♥

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I was reading this Alec Baldwin interview and wanted to quickly talk about this question:

Durham, N.C.: Alec, I am a huge fan of "30 Rock." Best show on television. And you probably get this questions all the time, but do you think Jack and Liz will hook up?

Alec Baldwin: I sincerely doubt it, and I think the show is better off that way. Once they cross that line, all the tension goes out of those relationships. And I think the lesson we learned about both those characters is that they are married to their jobs and they are married to their work.

*HEARTS* What I love about Alec's answer is that it proves that he and Tina are well aware that they have the most awesomely electric sexual chemistry and that they don't want to mess with that. Because I am totally fine with them never hooking up on the show because their relationship is perfect the way it is. Okay I'd like them to hook up in the last ever episode or something, although I would prefer there to never be a last ever episode. It should go on forever or until we all die.

~

Charlie's feud with the neighbour cat continues. I actually really need to make a movie of them fighting through the kitchen door because it's quite incredible to watch, especially when they try to attack each other. See the problem is, this other cat thinks he is in charge of our balcony and he'll often sit on the ledge separating our place and the neighbour's place, guarding the balcony, and just watching Charlie, who can't do anything other than stare back at him, growling. When I do let Charlie out, they usually end up scrapping, and now Charlie is a bit terrified of going outside because the other cat is bigger and more arrogant than him. I have this beautiful dream that they will one day become the best of friends, but when I suggested this to Kirsty she was all, "Yes! And then after that, world peace." Which wasn't a very nice thing to say.

Recent things that have made me happy:

1. "30 Rock", Tina Fey, Alec Baldwin, Jack and Liz and how they are BFFs who TOTALLY WANT TO SHAG EACH OTHER.

2. CLOIS. <3 <3 <3

3. Abyss (I'm sorry but I liked it! And I liked what Clark did! And I like Chloe again, finally!!!)

4. "Ghost Town". It was funny AND moving: my favourite combination. Any film with this much heart is a winner, afaic.

5. "Friday Night Lights". Oh my God I love this season. ♥ ♥ ♥

6. Fish finger sandwiches. The easiest thing ever to make and always delicious. Always.

7. Charlie! I need to picspam him again, because he's the best cat of all time. He went outside for the first time on Friday and I was so proud of him. Within five minutes the ginormous neighbourhood cat, who has been feuding with Charlie through our (glass) kitchen door, turns up on the balcony and Charlie instantly pounds towards him and jumps on his head. The enemy cat looked *so surprised* it was genius. Clearly he was not expecting Charlie to ever actually be let loose on him. Then he slunk off, defeated and embarrassed. \o/

8. Alexandra's performance on Saturday's X Factor.

9. Leona Lewis's cover of Snow Patrol's "Run".

Recent things that have annoyed me:

1. This post. A WORLD OF NO. (ETA. Screening the comments every time you're not around to answer them is rampantly stupid and does not make you look like less of a dick, fyi.)

2. Louis Walsh. Get the fuck off my television. I used to like you but now I really don't. Also, when you say to Eoghan (every fucking week) that he'll be in the final, and then you say the same thing to Diana, the whole world is thinking, "And what about JLS, asshat? You know, *the group you mentor*?"

3. Eoghan Quigg. *stabs*

The weekend was weird. On Saturday the girls and I went to a couple of films at the film festival, the first of which was lovely ("Cover Girl" with Gene Kelly and Rita Hayworth), the second of which was the single worst film experience I've maybe ever had (and I've seen "Salo"). If you ever want to know what my idea of film hell is, check out "Tony Manero", ( Read more... )

Then I got home to discover something wrong with Charlie's ear. He had the first of his leukemia shots on Friday so I wonder if it's reaction to that, but he now seems to have an ear infection if the internet is to be believed. He keeps scratching his ear and shaking his head, and it's lying a bit flat. ARGH. (I actually wrote this bit yesterday and thankfully Charlie seems fine today, so I guess it must have been a side effect of the shot. Which is a relief because he's bleeding me dry right now. I can't remember the last time I was this broke.)

The X Factor

Yes, apparently this is the only show I want to talk about these days! Even though, like, only three of you give a shit. I'll cut this for once, to spare the rest of you.

( Austin: my beautiful new boyfriend. <3 )

~

I have not seen Smallville yet, but hopefully I will get a bit of solo living room time tonight after work.

~

And now for the interactive portion of the post.

( How do you feel about the term 'Friends'? )

Poll #1281826
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 38

"Friends"

If no, what would you prefer instead?

I am in a very Tom Welling space at the moment, friends. It's not that I ever went off him (not possible) but during hiatus I wasn't quite as focused on lusting after him as I normally am. But he is looking so fine right now I can barely handle it. He's as beautiful as he's always been (perhaps more so?) but his sex appeal is through the freaking roof this season, and I'm not sure if it's the suits, the hair, the body, the face, or the fact that he's just being really manly all the time. SUPERmanly, you might say.

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I took Charlie to the vet for the first time on Friday, for his last vaccination and a general check up; afterwards I was planning on finally letting him go outside, something he's been dying to do (he spends much of his day staring out windows now). Unfortunately things didn't go as planned. Not only has he been mildly sick (a cold or something) which meant the vet didn't want to give him a shot, my wee angel has a heart murmur. This is apparently not uncommon with young cats but it sounds so serious to me, and of course I spent all of Friday in tears. So yeah, having a pet is not all fun and games, it can be hard. I love him so much and he's not in perfect health and that kills me. :(

~

At least television is happy-making though!

The X Factor

This show rules all right now. My entire flat is addicted and we have even come up with an X Factor drinking game (which will work just as well with American Idol btw): every time someone cries you take a drink; if you cry you down your glass. Man, we got DRUNK. Also, we have decided that we are only allowed to vote once, as a flat (I agreed to this very reluctantly. See, I originally claimed that because I care more I should be the only one to vote -- unless they agreed with me in which case they would also be allowed to vote -- but this plan was met with some resistance. So now we are going to vote between the three of us each week and if we all choose different people it will be down to the roll of a dice or some such thing. This system already scares me).

We're down to the final twelve now and the live shows start next Saturday. Each judge put two people through that I agreed with and one I didn't. Not that it really matters because my two favourites are through, and they are both so much better than everyone else in the competition if they don't end up in the final I will be devastated.

First, we have Austin, who I am a little bit in love with. He's got it all: he's utterly gorgeous, he's a great performer with a lot of sex appeal on stage, he's an incredible singer, and he cries constantly. Perfection! Simon's criticism that he comes across as too desperate is the most absurd thing I've ever heard; he is no more desperate than any other contestant. This show is all *about* insane desperation for pete's sake, and clearly Simon is only saying that because they need to give *some* negative feedback and he couldn't think of anything else.

Check him out: Austin sings "Valerie" at Boot Camp.

My other favourite contestant is Alexandra, because she is a world class talent and easily the best singer we've had on this show since Leona Lewis. Heck, she's 19 years old and she sang 'Natural Woman' in the latest round, and *nailed* it. I've been passionate about her since her first extraordinary audition, and she's continued to blow me away with each subsequent audition. She's in a league of her own and, unlike Austin, who makes me laugh every time he cries, she makes me *cry* every time she cries. She's my girl, I want her to win, and I want to buy her albums in the future. ♥

Added to that, I love all our judges (except Danni, who I only have lukewarm feelings for): as you all know, I would have sex with Simon in a heartbeat, and Louis is adorable. His wee face! Cheryl is the real surprise though. I *adore* her. She's absurdly beautiful, but she's also sweet and compassionate and honest and down to earth.

All I'm saying is, if this were a competition between American Idol and The X Factor, The X Factor wins. That's all I'm saying. Even our presenters kick ass: Dermot and Holly are both so legendary that I now secretly ship them and if I was that kind of fangirl I would be writing fanfic about them skipping down the beach together being silly and giggling a lot. OTOH, Ryan Seacrest is pure evil.

~

I might write some Clois. Prompts would be most helpful!

1. I must admit I have not really paid much attention to my flist over the past few days, so if you think I missed something important, link me. Instead I have been glued to my couch watching television, and/or winding my cat up with the Kat Tikkler (it's this long stick with a bunch of green feathers attached to it. He has ripped off a lot of the feathers already -- I found one in my hair this morning -- but every time he tries to eat them they just get stuck on his lips.)

2. tommy_chivs! Charlie goes insane over the laser pointer, just like your cats. Hours and hours of fun (and when you get sick of tormenting him and turn it off it takes him ages to stop looking for the red light. MWAHAHA).

3. I wasn't super popular at school, Boppy, but I wasn't a social reject. I was actually a "muso" (music nerd) but because we were entertaining people tended to respect us.

4. "Lust, Caution" is an okay film but that's not what's important about it. What is important about it is, once you get through all the dreary exposition, you get several of the most incredibly intense and erotic sex scenes I have ever seen. And because I know you're all a bunch of pervs I feel comfortable telling you that they are so explicit it really does look like they're fucking. WHOO. (Tony Leung is amazing. <3)

5. This is crazy I know but I am actually excited about the Smallville premiere. HA! It's like, every time I think I've moved on and don't care anymore I apparently haven't!

6. I'm one behind on Mad Men, but the last episode I watched blew me away. I never told you guys who my favourite Mad Men character is - this is controversial, because he is not my type at all, but it's Don. I don't fancy him and I don't like him very much, but I find him the single most compelling character on television at the moment. He's mesmerising.

7. The X Factor! Another really good female singer through to boot camp. I am very excited - there are now at least four excellent girls, and they're all really different from each other - whichever judge gets that category is going to do well. (Alexandra Burke is still the major discovery though zomg.)

8. Here is one television cliche if I ever see again it will be too soon: when a couple are getting a DVD out from the store and the girl wants a chick flick and the guy wants an action movie. AS IF THEY ARE THE ONLY TWO GENRES OF FILM IN ALL THE WORLD. As if there are no films that both of the sexes can enjoy. As if there are no action films that women can like and no romantic comedies that men can like (my dad's favourite genre of film is the romantic comedy you doofuses!). As if anyone would be *happy* to get a film out that they *know* the person they're watching it with IS GOING TO HATE. This scene needs to never be written again. I am so serious about this.

Charlie is very much settled now and completely hilarious. He recently noticed that his tail is clearly an enemy and he keeps trying to catch it. It makes me laugh but also feel sorry for him because he's doomed to failure. <3

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Been watching Queer As Folk, season 2. It's pretty bad, isn't it. But in a good way. Mostly I watch it because Gale Harold has the most beautiful body I've ever seen. It's perfect. The symmetry, the proportions, the colour of his skin. How can anyone look that incredible naked? Most people look silly naked! But Gale doesn't, and fortunately he is naked a whole lot. I also enjoy the Brian/Justin relationship - they are really hot and sweet together.

( *bites fist* )

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In other television news, I have gotten into the habit of regularly watching Numb3rs (S3), even though it's awful and I hate it. In fact, Suz and I watch it together and just complain the whole way through the episode. I hate all the characters except Charlie (WHOO. GOOD NAME) and his hot brother (holy shit! He's the dude from Northern Exposure! He grew up all sexy, wow). Suz swears that the show was good in the first season but I don't believe her at all, although I'm willing to believe it was a bit better if most of the current cast weren't in it then. You'd think it would be right up my alley because I love shows about charming geniuses (see Bones and House) but the writing is too dumb (and too dull) to win me over.

~

Speaking of Bones, what did we all think of the first two episodes? I thought they were sexy and amusing in places, and I love the show no matter what, but otherwise not so much. They made London look utterly gorgeous though, so kudos to that at any rate.

I has kitty pictures! He's so sweet. He has the loudest purr ever and he's very affectionate; he absolutely loves being touched, which is a quality I look for in a cat. I love him so much and I am annoyed at having to be at work because I really miss him. He is eight months old.

( PUSS! )

ISN'T HE AMAZING. <3 <3 <3

He is the most gorgeous, slutty, funny, awesome kitty of all time. His name is Charlie Sparkles Lewis. (We tried with the fannish names but none worked.) If you're wondering about the middle name it's because he was called Sparky when I got him and he totally suited it. HE IS PERFECT. I am smitten, and a little drunk now. Also, hilariously, I have puffy eyes and a runny nose. Apparently I am allergic to a house of cats! (There were at least twenty of the little beasts at Ashye's place but I grew up with cats and I've never had this problem before so I'm not remotely worried.)

OMG YAY!