We have ANTS in my house. I fucking HATE ants. I left New Zealand to get AWAY from insects. I didn't even know you guys HAD ants in the UK. It's too cold isn't it? And the little fuckers are so fucking difficult to get rid of. One ant? I can handle. But there's never just one is there. They hang around in packs and they're sneaky. I vacuumed some up the other day and Hamish claimed that it wouldn't kill them and that now we have ants crawling around inside our vacuum cleaner. Please tell me he's insane and that there's no way an ant would survive that kind of trauma. *deep frown*
And now for something completely different.
I thought I was the queen of difficult polling right? NOT SO. I've never had a problem doing my own polls. But yesterday, amandajane5 posted a poll I literally COULDN'T DO.
She wanted to know who our favourite SPN and SV boys were, and yeah, Jared wins for SPN, but I honestly could not choose between Tommy and Mike. Seriously, I couldn't do it. If I chose Mike it'd be like I was betraying Tom and vice versa. I AM OFFICIALLY CRAZY.
See, I think most of you have a favourite. Are there any of you out there like me? Who loves them both equally to the point where they can't do a *fun harmless poll*?
I spent my walk to work pondering and comparing and allocating points. Maybe youse fullahs can help decipher my system and let me know if I have a favourite (though I swear, I will NEVER DO THAT POLL NEVER. What if it got back to one of them? And then I met them and they were pissed about it? WHAT ABOUT THAT?)
- Tom is more photogenic.
- But Mike is a better actor.
- Clark has a bigger cock.
- But Lex has the sexiest voice ever.
- They're both porn stars and they're both naked in my head an EQUAL AMOUNT.
- Lex is way smarter but Clark is way stronger.
- They aren't complete without the other. You can't have Clark without Lex and you can't have Lex without Clark. They complete each other. JUST LIKE IN JERRY MAGUIRE.
- "You had me at *coughsplutter* 'why the fuck aren't you dead?'"
- They're both as filthy as each other.
- Although, that said, Clark likes to, ahem, felch. And yeah, Lex *would* do it, but I don't think he'd love it quite as much as Clark does.
- Clark has almost no recovery time and can get hard after coming pretty much straight away.
- But Lex can fuck for a lot longer before coming.
- I'm marginally more sexually attracted to Tommy than Mike, but I also fancy Lex more than Clark.
- Except, of course, when Clark's on red K.
- Mike seems like the most fun, crazy person ever and he and I would be good friends if we met.
- Tom, I'd just like to fuck a lot.
I think I'd better stop there before I develop a tumour. So now, I collate all the points and they get five billion points each and it's a TIE. *sigh*
Add to my list people! What am I forgetting? WHO DOES KATE LOVE MOST?