Kate (mskatej) wrote,

  • Mood:

A post not about porn. Just kidding!

Someone on my flist yesterday said that she didn't like porn.

*wide eyes*

I was like, WHOA NOW. She must hhhhhhhate me. Let's review the week.

Sunday: A post about how porny Cillian Murphy is
Sunday: A post about my flatmate's porn collection and me borrowing some of it
Monday: A post about porn kinks and what I like in SV porn
Tuesday: A poll about porn kinks
Tuesday: A picspam of Tom Welling (a porn star if ever there was one)
Wednesday: Fic, aka PORN.
Today: Well, I've already used the word porn ten times in this post, so you work it out.

I guess you could be forgiven for thinking that I had a one-track mind but that's bullshit. Sometimes I think (and post) about Smallville. Of course, if you put those two things together... *wanders off in a daze*

Talk to me, flist.

Do I talk about porn too much?

You don't talk about it nearly enough, quite frankly. (I'm a giant hor.)
No. You talk about it just the right amount. (I'm a giant hor.)
How the fuck should I know? I barely even skim read your journal.
You're a mentalist. Stop making us do polls.
Get help, Kate. I mean it. YOU NEED HELP.
Yes. All the porn talk is making me sleepy.
If you stop talking about porn, I'll defriend your ass.

And anyway, on the subject of porn, whenever I want to read a story these days, I go to norwich36 smutrecs page and pick one I haven't read yet, and yesterday I printed off Last Buns of Krypton and I spent much of last night reading it and I still haven't even finished yet because it's LONG. Long and smutty. And HILARIOUS. Okay, I'm sitting there, reading it and getting all hot and bothered and then some insane and genius (and completely inappropriate yet strangely fitting) euphemism for cock gets slipped into the story and I find myself laughing out loud. Btw, in this story, Clark is happily moonlighting as a gay porn star and he has a "foot long shlong". Ha. Here are a few gems:

Lex's dick. Art deco ice cream cone, fuck, he'd treat it like one, lick and suck and make Lex never want to go back to women.

And the mere idea that Clark was pulling his pants down from his hips, over the curve of his ass, sent a jolt of electricity right through his crotch cobra.

"I'm sure," Lex purred; beneath the purr there was a nervousness, a giddy nervousness because, yeah, Lex Luthor wanted Clark's giggle stick *badly*, threat of tears or no.

Clark's blood pressure had to be screaming with the sheer amount of need pumping through his veins, not to mention his blue-veined root-on.

Lex didn't have words anymore -- not with his tight ass stretching around Clark's thick love lollipop.

God, there are so many more in there, even better than the ones I found, but I don't have time to read the story again so there.

What's not to love about porn, I ask ya.
Tags: polls, porn, recs, tv: smallville
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