Orson the cat is in my BAD BOOKS. I have *crippled* myself, because of him.
So late last night, I'm running from the living room to the kitchen, and the light in the hall is out and Orson is in his usual spot on the floor in the hall next to the heater and because he's SO FAT, he takes up, like, a LOT of room, and if you're not careful you'll step right on top of him. Which of course, I don't want to do (I'm an animal lover). And because I was running (I needed to refill my drink and then go write some Lexana!), avoiding stepping on top of him meant tripping and then *bashing* my toes against the bannister. I screamed and hopped about for a while and FUCK ME did it hurt, but I assumed I'd be fine by the morning.
NOPE. I can't even walk. Well, I *can* walk, but very very slowly and with a limp. I don't *think* I've broken my toe, but I've definitely done some damage. At the moment my foot feels numb and sort of freezing, which I don't understand because the rest of me is warm. Not that Orson gives a fuck. He came and slept in my arms all night as if he'd done nothing wrong! Unbelievable!
I hobbled to work this morning because there was some shit I had to get done, but I plan to go home early, put my foot up and read the next three parts of Landscape (I'm very excited about that) and maybe write some really dirty Lexana. I mean, don't you think that if Lex were to fuck Lana, it'd be really really nasty? With Clark, it would have been all, "I wuv you *kissy kissy*", no orgasm and plenty of cuddling afterwards. With Lex though, it'll be Lana on all fours with her legs spread wide and Lex spanking the shit out of her, calling her a whore and then fucking her into oblivion. Hee. The possibilities for porn are just endless in Smallville, aren't they. This is why I'm so happy here.
Finally, I've decided to do that meme: The Top Ten Ways You Know You Are Reading A Story by Kate:
- It hasn't really got a story
- It's excessively pornographic
- It's amusing
- It's angst free
- It has a happy ending
- It's romantic
- It has a lot of short sentences and paragraphs
- It's easy to read
- It contains almost no metaphors and very few descriptions of surroundings
- It's not very long
That's all from me today! I hope your Monday is less painful than mine and that your cats are well behaved! *hops about*